Cause and Effect

When i am spiraling downwards and into the thinly veiled depression that sometimes greets my life, it seems as though i always bring someone down with me. Not in a way that i grab them and pull them down, but i bring a mental hostage with me, my mental persona of that person tethered to my flailings against the impossibility that is my down strokes, and it is always a girl, and i am always convinced that i am in love.

OR

When i fall for a girl and she does not share my same feeling, it tips the wavelength in a downward path. My frequency is higher than most peoples, the ups higher and the downs lower, and when i get spurned, or, not even spurned but not greeted with immediate and mostly unsolicited love in return, i fall apart. It is always paired with something else, mostly academic, but sometimes economic, and then the two spiral off of each other, the double helix that makes my life possible now just a double chute, accelerating my descent.

it should be AND